Safety Planning

Safety Plan While Living In An Abusive Relationship

Home Plan:

• I will make sure there are two ways to exit my home or apartment building.
• I will teach my children how to place a 911 call and when to use it in case of an emergency.
• I will make sure my children know my cell phone number.
• I will make sure my children have other phone numbers to call:
  • trusted friend
  • family
• I will have a safe codeword confidentially with my children.
• I will call the police (911) immediately if my abusive partner makes me feel unsafe or in danger.
• I can tell a neighbour about my situation and ask them to call the police if they hear any suspicious noises coming from my home.
• I will keep my purse and keys in a secure spot near my door in case I have to leave in an emergency. I will leave a change of clothes, copies of documents/keys and extra money with ________ (friend or family).
• I will keep a “go bag” in a secure location, accessible for me to grab quickly. Recommended contents:
  • All forms of identification for myself and for my
    • children (passports, medical care cards, birth certificates, etc.) (original or copy)
    • Immigration/status papers
    • Financial records
    • Car registration, insurance papers
    • Rental agreement, house deed
    • School and medical records
    • Money, bankbooks, credit cards
    • Divorce papers
    • Current unpaid bills
    • Medications
    • Address books
    • Jewelry
    • Pictures
    • Phone charger and phone cord
• I will make sure my cell phone is always charged and with me both at home and when leaving my home.
• To ensure my safety and independence, I can:
  • open my own bank account at a different bank
  • always have a transit card and/or funds for taxi or Uber with me
  • review and rehearse my escape plan with my children and support persons
  • take pictures of all my documents and have them on my phone and if possible, scan and send them to a friend
• I can let a friend or a co-worker know of my whereabouts when I am not at home and check in with them at certain times.
• I can ask _______ (friend or classmate) to screen my calls at work or at school.
• I will inform my boss, or coworker about my situation and share a picture or identifying characteristics of my abusive partner (height, weight, hair colour/style, facial hair, tattoos, etc.) and description of his vehicle (type, colour, license plate, etc.)
• If I decide to leave my home to be safe, I can go to or call any of the following places:
  • police station
  • fire hall
  • hospital
  • church
  • grocery store
  • transition house
  • library
  • community centre

Emotional Plan:

• If I feel that I am not safe, I will talk to someone (family, friend, transition house staff) for support.
• Should my circumstances change, I will meet with my counsellor or trusted friend to update my safety plan.
• I will be aware that drugs and alcohol can impair a person’s ability to react quickly and rationally in an emergency situation and not allow myself to become vulnerable or be in a bad situation.
• I will continue to live life as usual – so not to alert my abusive partner of any changes I am planning.
• I will take the additional precautions to increase my safety and independence.

Safety Plan After Leaving An Abusive Relationship

Home Plan:

• I will use the deadbolt and I will teach my children how to use the deadbolt when we are in the apartment.
• I will use the peephole and I will teach my children to use the peephole before answering the door.
• I will make sure there are two ways to exit the apartment building.
• I will close the door behind me and I will teach my children how to close the door.
• I will keep my windows locked.
• I will teach my children how to place a 911 call and when to use it in case of an emergency.
• I will make sure my children know my cell phone number.
• I will have a safe codeword confidentially with my children.
• I will call the police (911) immediately if my abusive partner approaches or comes on my property.
• I will not tell anyone who might be in contact with my abusive partner my address or my phone number.
• I will request an unlisted telephone number and/or caller ID, when I move into my new home.
• I will disable the GPS (location tracking) on my cell phone.
• I will keep my purse and keys in a secure spot near my door in case I have to leave in an emergency.
• If comfortable, I will alert my landlord and/or neighbours about my abusive partner and share a picture or identifying characteristics. (height, weight, hair color, facial hair, tattoos, etc.) and description of his vehicle

School/Work/Public Plan:

• I will make sure my cell phone is charged before leaving my home.
• I will keep a copy of my Protection Order with me at all times (in a zip lock bag and an electronic copy on my phone).
• I will inform my boss, or coworker about my situation and share a picture or identifying characteristics of my abusive partner.
• I can ask ____________ (friend or family) to screen my calls at work or at school.
• When I leave work, I can have someone walk me to my car or the bus stop and be on the phone with someone while waiting.
• When I drive home, if problems occur, I can call 911, drive to the closest police station, or drive to a busy public parking lot and run into the store. I can also take a different route home each time.
• When I take the bus or SkyTrain, if problems occur, I can tell the bus driver I am not feeling safe or I can pull the emergency cord.
• I can let a friend or a co-worker know of my whereabouts when I am not at home.
• I can avoid going to public places that were common with my abusive partner.

Emotional Plan:

• I will work with my lawyer to arrange visitation arrangements with _ so that I do not have to have face-to-face contact with my abusive partner.
• Should I have to talk to my abusive partner in person or over the phone, I will limit the call to the purpose for the call and refuse to discuss anything else that I am not comfortable with. I will save any messages/screen shots.
• Should I miss the relationship with my abusive partner, I will talk to someone (family, friend, transition house staff).
• If I feel that I am not safe, I will talk to someone (family, friend, transition house staff) for support.
• Should my circumstances change, I will meet with my counsellor or trusted friend to update my safety plan.
• I will be aware that drugs and alcohol can impair a person’s ability to react quickly and rationally in an emergency situation and not allow myself to become vulnerable or be in a bad situation.
• I will take additional precautions to increase my safety and independence.